In the words of Lewis Black, “If you’re an adult, and you’re planning to wear a costume on Halloween….Don’t. I will find you, I will hurt you. It’s not an adult holiday, it’s a holiday for children. That’s who it is for.”
With that being said, college is really the last forum where wearing a costume in public on Halloween does not become borderline weird. I don’t particularly care for Halloween, but given the spirit of corporate bailouts, children should get in on the fun too.
I see Halloween as an opportunity to pass out in someone else’s shoes. So, I have decided on my costume that will most likely be worn three nights in a row because I am too lazy to think of three different costumes. Also, another thought on Halloween, couples who dress up together…lame. Costumes like these are neither funny nor original. Now, a costume about nothing works, if, everyone actually looks like every character. Or, your costume can downright hilariously awesome on new levels of bad-assery that constantly makes people laugh. A Stephen Hawking costume is always funny, always.
So, for my costume this year, I have decided to go with Steve McNair, too soon? I say no, all of the elements for a bitchin’ costume are in place. Hilarious? check. Shocking? check? Somewhat scary? check. In bad taste? most notably. However, the final piece remains a mystery, and that is Sahel Kazemi. To be historically accurate, we can meet at the local Dave & Buster’s, I’ll get hammered and let her drive home, then get arrested for marijuana possession and finally I’ll pass out on the couch and she’ll sleep on the floor.
No other couples costume could possibly come close unless you can pull off Roman Polanski. In any case, I suggest that all of you Reeders out there send in your costume and the best one gets 100 words to say whatever they want following the game on Monday.
P.S.
